Car Free Day..

It's 3rd sunday of the months and it's car free day!
It's our thing that every car free day we would take our bike and bike around the road that usually full with cars.

It's a nice feeling to see everyone else also biking, some were walking.. saw lots of kids walking around either with their parents or just them self.
so we wore our hats, and start cycling. the kids ride along with my husband, and i ride by myself.
as we approached the big roundabout, lots of people doing the dancing exercise and also so many people sell snacks and food.

We biked for about an hour then we went back home and bought some Indonesian snacks and chicken porridge home. We had fun, the kids are more than happy :)

Have a nice Sunday!

cheers..

Be well..

Few days  ago, my cousin found out that she lost her beloved baby in her 31weeks tummy, she named her Abigail. What a pretty name.

We were really shocked, sad, devastated, especially when the doctor said there were nothing wrong with the pregnancy and the baby, and she just had a monthly check up few days before, and everything was perfect.

This bring back my memories about my little angel, Adeline who went to heaven 6 years ago. My husband also feel the same thing, I can feel his grief. I'm really sad, I cried for baby Abigail, I felt so sorry for my cousin and mostly I miss my little Adeline. I know I shouldn't, she's an angel in heaven now, but I can't help it. The regret of not having a chance to hold her, to say goodbye to her, were crawling into my heart, it's very hurt, i cried hard that night. I was upset that no one would think that it's the best for me to be able to hold my baby for the last time, that I can move on and accept everything. Ah well.. i just hope that i can fully heal my heart as time passed by. Maybe one day when I died, I could finally see her and hug her.

I couldn't go to Abigail's funeral, because my girl, Nicolene was sick. I really really wanted to go, but I think somehow it wasn't meant to be for me to go. Maybe it's the best for me not to go, I would probably cried hard again or fainted.

I feel so sorry for my cousin, it's very very devastated to have a stillbirth. I will try my best to comfort her, I know how she feel. been there. I just hope that no one would experience the same thing.

Be well all..

Love letter for my angel Adeline..

Dear my little angel Adeline,

Today it's been 6 years since you went to heaven.. mommy still missing you every single day..

Mommy often sit and wonder what you would be like if you were here.. Would you be look like daddy or mommy? Mommy often Imagined you play with your little sister and brother..

Every night mommy still wishing that you'll come to my dream just to say hello..  It's always been my regret that mommy never see you, never hold you.. But one day we will see each other and mommy will give you the warmest hug..

Be happy always dear.. Mommy n daddy love you always and forever..

Love,

Mommy

Faces of Nicolene

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